Help & Advice - Guides for Commanders, Colleagues and Families

There are and always have been homo- and bisexual personnel living, sleeping and showering with others of the same gender without anyone knowing of their orientation. Disclosure of that orientation will not result in a sudden shift from discretion to blatant flaunting. Why would it? If homo- and bisexual people disclosed their orientations they would be even more careful after disclosure to avoid any speech or action that might be interpreted as sexual interest, knowing that after disclosure, actions previously interpreted as innocent (such as asking someone to go out for drinks, putting a hand on someone's shoulder, sitting on someone's bed for a chat, etc.) can often be interpreted as sexually motivated.

The problem is not what the homo- or bisexual person might do, the problem is the misconceptions held by nervous heterosexual personnel.

And the question is not whether or not a homo- or bisexual person might find a naked comrade in the shower attractive; the question is whether or not the homo- or bisexual person behaves unacceptably.

All the evidence indicates that they most likely will not. That doesn't mean it will never happen, as there are always exceptions to the rule.

Finally, just as heterosexual men are not attracted to ALL women (or heterosexual women to ALL men), homo- and bisexual people are not attracted to ALL those of their own gender.

Tips for colleagues

• Get to know what the stereotypes are and how they negatively impact on the work environment. Acknowledge if you have any.
• If a person comes out, get to know them as a person, not in terms of their sexual orientation.

Tips for commanders

• Make it clear that homosexual and bisexual personnel are welcome and free to disclose their orientation.
• Ensure that anti-gay humour and sentiment is not acceptable in the workplace.
• Offer support, and access to support services, for staff who come out, and their colleagues.
• If safety is an issue, consider relocating the person with their agreement, and provide workplace education.
• Ensure integration.

Further advice and information for colleagues and commanders alike can be found at:

Gays in the Military - FAQs

Frequently Asked Questions for Commanders and Managers